On Saturday the second XI
travelled bloody miles to Fleet. The traffic
was a nightmare and Glen's Mrs had managed
to rip the vital page out of the map so we
got lost trying to find a "short cut". Armed
with a somewhat makeshift team of sorts
(thanks to the careless abandonment of the
captain) we honestly looked a stronger
hockey team than a cricket team.
Following his now
customary Zen attitude of "the path of least
responsibility is by far the most appealing"
stand in skipper Hewston promptly lost the
toss and was told he would be batting first.
The track looked as hard as a paedophile in
a playground and as green as Dusty's special
herbs. Some sideways movement was expected!
Openers Gooch and Scott
(called in at the last minute) were soon
fending balls off their chops from a good
length as the Fleet 7ft opener found a
rather "interesting" patch on the wicket.
Not wanting to give away the upper hand
Gooch was playing his shots and raced to 6
before one got big on him, (not surprising
given the fact that he is only 5' 5") and he
was caught at 1st. Next up Mr Enthusiasm,
aka Glen. At the other end there was a lack
of concentration and after watching 5 balls
go wide Warren watched a straight one take
his middle stump. (2-6 not going exactly to
plan). Up strode the captain with blood shot
eyes. He obviously hadn't got much sleep the
night before as he was up worrying about his
field placements. Glen was looking fairly
comfortable even if he wasn't scoring and
was unlucky to get out "played on" after a
ball from the opener was played straight
down, back spun, pin balled between pad and
bat and eventually knocked a bail off. Three
down for bugger all really. Cartledge to the
wicket. The captain thought he would
re-evaluate the situation and told his
compadre that occupation of the crease was
the main priority. Naturally being great
mates Martin took on board what Tony had
said and after some gentle goading from the
opposition whacked one over the top pretty
much immediately. Still a partnership was
formed and things started to look a little
brighter. Fleet thought they had had all the
luck they were going to; when the wicket
helped Cartledge to rather limply loft one
to mid on. Out for 12.
Time for the African Invasion. Modelling his
batting on Kallis but achieving something
like Cassius Clay, Laubser ducked and weaved
until he danced like a butterfly and stung
like a bee. The strike was rotated
frequently and by this time the captain had
thrown away his reckless style and was
getting his head down to some good old
graft. Not once, not twice, not even thrice
did he pummel the ball along the ground at
extra cover, breaking a finger and giving a
rather nasty bruise along the way. What a
horrid hard ball! The partnership was
looking strong and just before the drinks
break, with the score on 99, Hewston raised
his bat to salute his 50 for a second time
after a false first call by the admiring
spectators. After drinks, Hewston (56) only
lasted another two overs before the 7 foot
opener who was still going with a Trojan
effort got him with one that jagged back
sharply. Laubser not wanting to be away from
his beloved captain too long couldn't take
the heat and was out shortly after. We were
back up against the ropes. In went Grubber,
a great catch at first slip and back came
Grubber. Neil Turner was shaky to start but
settled in nicely until a crap full toss was
smashed wide of mid on and a one handed
diving catch was lucky enough to see him
back to the pavilion. Gobby was working his
end well and even talked the ball over the
boundary without bouncing for a six. Noting
the player was then put back, he (rather
intellectually) tried to put the next ball
down his throat. Feeling charitable, the
Fleet opening bat decided to drop Gobby and
break his finger in the process. Something
that the aforementioned youngster was
happily regaling for some hours after. Peter
Waters and Mohammed made sure that the tail
wagged over the 150 marker for some extra
points, finishing 160 all out.
A rather mediocre tea was
consumed. Nothing to write home about.
After a sterling team
talk CSPCC took the field opening with
Cartledge and Stephens. It wasn't long
before we sent back batters 2 and 3 who were
both bowled by Martin. Glen not wanting to
be left out got amongst the action and
removed the other opener. Chalfont's tails
were up slightly and the thought that all
might not be lost flowed around the field.
A bowling change saw El
Capitan remove Fleets top scorer with what
can only be described as a genius delivery.
(OK, it was sheer luck that he put the full
toss that I bowled him into Goochie's hand,
but I'm writing this, so there)!
Fleet cemented their
place a little and it took a great piece of
teamwork from Martin and Adam to remove the
next wicket caught behind. Hewston got one
more before he took himself off, and the
chorus of we're more than half way, they're
not echoed around the Chalfont Camp along
with various other incoherent ramblings from
Laubser, and sporadic appeals from cow and
fine leg from Waters and Stephens who had
obviously been to the same school as
youngsters and spent many hours sniffing
glue behind the bike sheds!
It was the time for the
youngster Waters to step up to the plate and
become a man. Realising the situation was on
a knife-edge he sent his first ball so far
down the off side it would have been hard to
reach with the Severn Bridge. However, he
pulled it back and produced a magnificent
piece of bowling removing three more Fleet
wickets.
Meanwhile, Martin was
turning even more beetroot coloured at his
end, and was unlucky/cheated (delete as you
feel appropriate) not to be given a rather
plumb LBW decision by the blind, senile old
fart that had come on to umpire at the
death.
In the end Fleet sneaked
it finishing on 161 - 9. A very enjoyable
game and some great performances from the
lads!
