CRICKET
Saturday 1st XI lost by 5 wickets against Amersham
Saturday 2nd XI lost by 5 wickets against Burnham III
Sunday 1st XI won by 83 runs against India IT
Sunday 2nd XI won by 67 runs against Flackwell Heath

SOFTBALL
Flames lost 7-27 against Thames Valley Outlaws
Phoenix won 22-10 against Rhythm
Flames lost 8-26 against Scratchers

CRICKET
Saturday 1st XI, Home against Gerrards Cross II, 1.30pm
Saturday 2nd XI, Away against Kidmore End II, 1.30pm
Sunday 1st XI, Home against Ashley, 1.00pm
Sunday 2nd XI, Away against Prestcold, 2.00pm

LOAN SCHEME DRAW

The latest draw was held on 7th May 2005 at the Club. The lucky winner, with number 28, was Martin Lamborn as witnessed by David Peters. Thanks again for the continued support of all the Loan Scheme members.

CSP U13 v CHEYENNE & LATIMER

The U13 got the season of to a flying start with a victory progressing to the second round of the league cup for the first time.

U13 won the toss and elected to bat but slipped to 7 for 3 but a 43 run partnership between Paul Neave 19 and Fazel 14 steadied the Goffers (short for go for everything). The late order all chipped in and managed to get to 88 for 9 off 20 overs. CSP bowled well with the pick being Grant Bradbury 4 overs 3 wicket 12 runs. Some excellent fielding with no dropped catches saw the goffers home with an 8 run margin.

DARTS CHAMPIONSHIP

The inaugural CPSA Darts Championship will be taking place on Saturday May 14th, from 6pm. It will consist of a mens and ladies knock-out tournament with cash prizes to the winner of each. Entry fees will be minimal and will be determined once the number of competitors is known. The draw for the championship will take place an hour before the start time.

Food will be available for purchase from the kitchen and for one night only there will be table football in the bar.

If you would like to compete then please either email me (neil@neilturnersoftware.com) or put your name on the posters that are up at the club.

What-ho Ginger! Field Marshall Sir Daniel 'Bomber' Webb reporting back to HQ on our magnificent victory on VF Day (Victory in Flackwell). It was a jolly boys outing with the troops from the 2nd Platoon Foot And Mouth (CSP Division), with a flying visit to Flackwell Heath. First up, we were on the back foot when the enemy decioded they would like to lob grenades at us first! Jolly unsporting old bean.

'Saffer' Collins and 'Paddy' Nagle were first to the fray, and when Paddy was shot down in flames we thought we were heading for a sticky wicket situation. Chocks away! 'Lanky' Hales went over the top and was mown down instantly. They don't like it up 'em sir! Saffer went on to take 73 square feet of enemy territory under heavy fire, whilst supported by the tea boy who joined up young and was sent to the front, 'Ginger' Yoxall, downed at the tender age of 24. New boy 'Creamy' Creamer took the fight to the enemy, taking two trenches under fire before being finally gunned down after killing 63 men, whilst 'Brylcream' Nolder picked up the baton and walked slowly towards the enemy guns making 40 yards before the enemy managed to shoot straight. We had gained 224 yards for the loss of six good men.

We had a short break for tiffin and some mugs of char to restore the troops confidence before pushing on to Berlin.

Lanky and Bomber opened up, one with a machine gun and one with an 17th century musket, but both ending up with just one victim each. 'Chubby' Upton took out two, showing immense bravery when out of ammunition to down them by throwing pies. Chin chin! Old timer 'Corporal Jones' Yoxall showed the young scallywags, like Ginger Yoxall, how it was done by showing the fuzzy wuzzies some cold steel to down three men with his sharpshooting. Brylcream made an impression on the field, quite literally, when diving to retrieve a grenade some six yards away from him, and 'Nancy' Davenport will be facing a Court Martial upon his return for failing to get his grenade on target from six inches.

In the end, victory was achieved by a clear margin of 67 yards of territory gained.

The 2nd Platoon Foot And Mouth (CSP Division) have returned for some R&R after their heroics on the battlefield, and are soon to be deployed aginst the Prestcold Panzer Division.

Pip pip!

Chalfont were the visitors to Amersham this week for the first league outing of the season. It's a very picturesque setting at the old Amersham ground, sun shining brightly, church bells ringing, all set for a great days cricket.

Chalfont won the toss and elected to bat first on a flat, but unsurprisingly soft wicket. At 6 for 4 wickets after 15 minutes it really couldn't have got any worse - until Shabs turned up in his National Express bus (sorry VW estate) to give us the first bollocking of the day. The lower middle order batted pretty well to mount something of a recovery, Mudo Ahmed and new recruit Fahrid Ahmed (30) helped to side to a final total of 92 (32 overs). Fahrid in particular showing great timing with some handsome shots through the covers and square of the wicket.

Tea - I would mention the tea but it wasn't required.

Our bowlers made a decent fight of it after tea. At one stage, with the opposition at 60 for 5, Chalfont were well in the game and fighting hard for an unlikely result, but Amersham dug in and eventually ground out a deserved win (93 for 5 from 33 overs). Fahrid, showing more promise with ball and bowling at a decent pace, Zed Khan and Shahid Din all did themselves justice with ball.

The final word has to rest with our most respected supporter Ken Mander. Ken, who turned up to support the boys for the second half of the game, only to see Chalfont trudging off the field in defeat, delivered his verdict in the changing room.

"That was a load of f**!!g Tosh lads".

Harsh but absolutely fair.

Chalfont 2 points. Amersham 20 points.